Positive birth story

Hello, I’m Laura, proud mama to three children Florence, Arlo and Juniper. I expect lots of you who are reading this are first time parents, so it’s hard to imagine having multiple children right now. My advice on having 3 is - it’s totally bonkers!

However I was very fortunate to have 3 low risk pregnancies and had all three of my babes at home.

I just wanted to share a little bit about my labours in relation to yoga and hypnobirthing, as a positive REAL example of how amazing it can be.

My friends think I’m crazy as I have always looked forward to ‘birth’, even before I was pregnant I never felt fearful at the thought of labour. My mother is a midwife, I am a paediatric nurse, previously working on a neonatal unit, so I have heard and seen a variety of births with things taking very different twists and turns, I didn’t just have my head in the clouds!

During my first pregnancy I practiced pregnancy yoga, and it was my teacher back then, a bit of an old eccentric yogi who used to talk about home births a lot in class, she gave me the idea. Before this I didn’t even think it was an option for our first baby, certainly my mum had never said anything about it. She was very much in labour ward matron mode back then!! I can’t really explain why, but the more research I did into home births, the more I felt like it was almost my calling. I just knew I could do it and it felt ‘right’ for my husband and I.

So the planning began! Knowing I would have no option for pain relief at home, I started looking into Hypnobirthing and started practicing at home using book and cd. I loved it, and it made sense to me. My daughter is now 9yrs and although that is not really that long ago, homebirths, and hypnobirthing were not very popular and lots of people thought I was a bit crazy!! Nonetheless, we ploughed on knowing we could do it, feeling more and more excited as the weeks went by.

My waters broke when I was 41 weeks, in the evening, the midwife came to my house to examine me and to confirm it was my waters. She explained if nothing had happened in 24hours I would have to go into hospital. I had no contractions and besides feeling fraught with excitement, my husband and I went to sleep for the night not knowing what might happen in next few hours. Woke up in the morning around 6ish and began getting mild cramps, so in knew we were on! 

Preparation began setting up the pool and everything else we had planned. My midwife came to see us around 10, I was getting regular contractions but not close together and was doing fine, we were actually having a really nice morning, tunes on, chatting etc, timing contractions, helping me breath through them, gentle yoga felt good for my body, remembering to relax. Midwife said to call her later when things progressing and she would come straight back. 

A few hours later she was back as I was in established labour, she examined me and said I was over 4cm and could get into the pool. Ohhhhhh the water felt wonderful. Highly recommend! Definitely helped with the pain and loved feeling weightless, bobbing around in between contractions. I got in the pool around 3pm, started pushing 5:45, Florence was born at 6:30pm.

I’m not going to lie, that crowning feeling really is quite something, but feeling her head pop out was intense relief, then her body following was much more managable, my midwife was amazing and told my husband what to do, so he ended up gently catching her and bringing her up to my chest. That moment, holding your baby for the first time is something that will never ever leave you, it is pure ecstasy. Oxytocin in its finest form. That feeling alone will make you want to have a million more babies, no matter how your birth you them! 

During this labour my husband kept on reminding me of my hypnobirthing cues and prompts, and it definitely helped me, visualising and staying calm and relaxed….as much as I could tolerate. Yoga during pregnancy, alongside hypnobirthing really does help you to be more relaxed in your pregnancy and the lead up to your birth, to fear less, to feel empowered, to believe your body can and will know how to birth your baby. To trust the process.

I’m not saying Hypnobirthing means a pain free labour, because it absolutely doesn’t, and I’m not saying it means you have to have a home birth either, I have heard some incredible caesarean birth stories and how Hypnobirthing was an wonderful tool during that too.

My son, who is now nearly 7, was born in very different circumstances. I still practiced a lot of yoga during his pregnancy and a little bit of hypnobirthing, but probably not as much as I could have. But had the same feelings of excitement for the labour. My waters broke this time in the night, thinking it would be the same long wait for my contractions to start. My husband made the long journey round the M25 to drop my daughter off with family, so she was out of the way. However, my labour progressed very quickly, and very intense. I called the midwife to come. My husband arrived back after about 1.5hrs, opened the front door to me moaning and groaning and feeling like I needed to push. It was total chaos trying to get the pool up, Gavin was a little fraught to say the least, trying to get it all assembled whilst I was mooing in the corner. He couldn’t get the hose properly attached to the tap, so there was scolding hot water flying everywhere, kitchen floor flooding, lots of swearing!!!! My midwife arrived and saved the day with a new adaptor for the sink. So the pool was now slowly filling up. But time was not on our side… I felt like I had to get in the pool there and then, I wanted to start pushing. There wasn’t enough water so had to crouch down low… It wasn’t like the last time!!! However, I homed in on my breathing and relaxing techniques and began pushing. Now this story isn’t to scare you, because it’s not a negative story, but to show you how amazing the body is. I will give you the short, censored version so fear not! I was pushing for a very long time and was in a huge amount of pain, having done it once before I knew something wasn’t right. 

I was examined for the first time and they gave me the bad news that my baby was ‘brow presentation’ so the forehead/eyebrows coming out first instead of top of head. Due to the anatomy of babies head shape and my pelvis etc they said it was not possible to deliver vaginally and I would need caesarean. A few events then happened, one of which was me being carried out of the pool by my husband and 2 midwives as I couldn’t move and I asked to sit on toilet of all places!!!!! They were making the call for the ambulance, I don’t know what came over me, I turned a bit crazy, I think I was so terrified at the thought of the drive in ambulance to hospital knowing how much pain I was in…but I started pushing and pushing and pushing! It was all very dramatic, as one midwife was telling me to stop pushing, the other midwife calling 999, poor Gavin was white. I didn’t stop pushing and the head started coming out, the midwifes were wild in shock not believing what they were seeing and the baby flew out pretty much on the floor. A little boy. Looked awful bless him, hugely swollen and bruised head, a flat nose from being squashed against my pelvis. Now as I said, this was a less detailed version. For my husband and midwives, I think it was all a bit scary and definitely very stressful, but for me… I was in a zone. I trusted my intuition, I believed I could do it. I was bruised and battered after, and recovery was tough, but yet still felt empowered and strong after what felt like was a truly positive birth. I got him out after all! I was almost a celebrity within the homebirth team… The brow presentation at home!!

This brings me finally on to my little Juni. I found a new hypnobirthing company this time (Holly de Cruz) and boy what a difference. I loved it!!!! My husband and I both listened to the mp3s every night and really got in it. Obviously being 3rd baby I knew the drill, but this was different, I was really on board with the Hypnobirthing. I had affirmations up all around the house, I was an A-star student. Yoga was such a blessing this time round too. When you have multiple children, life is so busy with them, you barely remember you’re pregnant half the time. Being on my yoga mat was the perfect oasis. Time to connect with my baby, my body, my breath. It helped me stay comfortable and connected.

At 39+2 weeks, my labour started…however I was very much in denial. My previous pregnancies had been overdue so this definitely wasn’t labour. I even thought my mum was an absolute twit when I called her saying I had this weird cramping pain in my bottom, but I was fine. She said as it was snowing, it would be safest to call the homebirth team, just to let them know you are starting to get pains, as they may take longer to get to me due to the weather. I thought what a silly women, all these years of midwifery and she thinks I’m in labour now, ha! 

My husband was out with the children so I thought I would put my hypno on with my headphones and get in to bed. I didn’t realise it, but I WAS labouring. I was almost in a bit of a trance like state I guess, enjoying all fours positions, managing my contractions, breathing on my own. 

Little did I know my mum had spoke with my husband saying things were starting, so he made arrangements for child care and came home to find me in bed on my hands and knees. He left me to it, not telling me he was calling the midwife. Next thing I remember was the midwife walking into my bedroom saying hello and I felt so embarrassed! I thought oh my gosh they are going to think I’m a huge time waster as not even in labour yet. I sat up, almost feeling like I was waking up, coming out of this trance and got a huge contraction. The midwife didn’t say anything, she stood next to me on the bed and gently held my head against her tummy until the contraction passed. It seems like a small tiny gesture but this has stayed in my mind, it felt so comforting and safe. At the time it felt magical just to be held whilst having a peak in my contraction. She said ‘you had better come downstairs as Gavin is doing the pool’. 

When we got downstairs it was like walking into a spa! Music, candles, pool warm and filled, I didn’t even know any of this had been going on! The midwife said I should get in the pool and I said no, ‘I’m not even in labour yet!’ She said ‘Laura get in the pool’! She just knew. She knew from my body language, my mood, my noises, she knew it was time. I didn’t even really feel myself pushing but I was. I truly got into the Hypnobirthing rhythm and with each contraction I was able to relax, and it really did work. It was honestly magic. 

The midwives asked if I wanted to feel my baby. Well at this point I thought they had absolutely lost the plot. No way was my baby’s head coming out… but I reached down and it was. My body took over and I gently birthed my baby into my own hands, almost smiling. Sounds crazy I know, but true. The most calm and serene moment in time, that I think even the midwives won’t forget.

All pregnancies and births are incredible and magical in their own way. However I truly believe yoga and hypnobirthing had been on a positive path and mindset from day 1. So explore, find a pregnancy yoga class you like, it’s important. Trust your team, trust yourself, find your rhythm and trust your body. I truly believe I was able to do all that I have done because I had no fear. Eliminate the fear and you are winning. Find a loving community, sisters to hold and support you. Women are amazing. Women’s bodies are amazing and women supporting women is the bomb… so get involved ladies.